So Blessed!

 
A few days ago, I had a bad day. Things hadn't really gone that well, and I was feeling kind of down and frustrated and ornery. During family scripture study before bed, we read a verse in Alma:

Alma 26:35

Now have we not reason to rejoice? Yea, I say unto you, there never were men that had so great reason to rejoice as we, since the world began; yea, and my joy is carried away, even unto boasting in my God; for he has all ^apower, ^ball wisdom, and all understanding; he comprehendeth all things, and he is a ^cmerciful Being, even unto salvation, to those who will repent and believe on his name.

Megan looked at me and said, "Mom, we really do have a lot of blessings, don't we?" Some times that's all it takes to shift things back into perspective.

Alma 26:16

Therefore, let us ^aglory, yea, we will ^bglory in the Lord; yea, we will rejoice, for our joy is full; yea, we will praise our God forever. Behold, who can glory too much in the Lord? Yea, who can say too much of his great power, and of his ^cmercy, and of his long-suffering towards the children of men? Behold, I say unto you, I cannot say the smallest part which I feel.

I really am so blessed. I have a wonderful husband and children who fill my life with joy. I have sisters who support and love me, who I can lean on in times of stress. I have a dad and stepmom, and father and mother-in-law, and grandparents who are such good examples of service and love and wisdom. I have a church family who have become very dear to my heart in the time that we have lived here. I have friends who are like family, who I can share ice cream and cookies, laughs and tears with. And most of all, I have a loving Heavenly Father and I have my Savior.

I'm not perfect

Hi, my name is Anna and I am not perfect.

I can't keep a journal because it intimidates me. The empty books are so perfect, so clean, so unblemished. I love to look at them, touch them, line them up neatly on shelves. But write in them? Gasp! I might make a mistake. No, not might. I WOULD make a mistake. I can't spell. My handwriting is atrocious. I would scribble things out. I would spill things on it. I would forget to write and get out of order.

Every year, in January, I make a goal to keep a journal. And every year, by the second week in January, I have given up. Those first few entries are labored over, in an effort to make them perfect. The struggle is too much, and so I give up. The first couple of nights go great. And then, one night after a busy day, I say to myself "I'll write tomorrow, when I have more time." And then the next night I say, "I have too much to write about to recap yesterday and today, so I"ll write tomorrow when I have more time." And then, the next thing I know, my beautiful new journal is sitting on my night stand, sprinkled with dust, with only the first few pages filled.

In my mind, in the perfect journal, the penmanship is smooth and flowing and elegant. The words are well chosen, the content is real, but at the same time it is always cheerful and insightful and uplifting, not preachy, but full of wisdom. The pages are smooth and unblemished. In my mind.

I am discovering that the image in my mind and reality don't mesh. And I'm working on becoming okay with that. Being okay with less than perfection. Or maybe I'm just redefining what perfection means. And I'm broadening my idea of what a journal should be. I bought a journal for my birthday. And I'm writing in it. Not every day. Not to record every aspect of every moment. Not to preserve my every thought for posterity. Simply because I enjoy the process. The idea of starting a new journal mid year seems wrong. The idea of not using it to capture all of the day's events, all of the cute things my kids do, seems selfish. The idea of not writing with the future generations - my children and grandchildren - as my audience seems wrong. But I'm going to do it any way.

My new journal is actually a book by Keri Smith called "Wreck This Journal." It's full of journaling exercises and assignments. Scribbling, riping, spilling, creasing, doodling, it's all in there. And I am loving it. I'm not writing in it in any kind of order, just doing what ever assignment appeals to me, so it won't be in chronological order, but that's okay. It is more me than any other journal I've ever kept. And that is a liberating feeling.

I'll post pictures as I go along. Here's my journal so far. I think it'll get a WHOLE lot messier before I'm done. 

Be BOLD

Mr. Irwin, my music teacher in high school, used to say, "If you are going to make a mistake, make a big one. Don't make a gray spot on a gray wall. Make a red spot. Don't make the mistake of being timid."

I made a red spot today. I went bold. I screwed up. I made a mess. And now I'm kicking myself. But, I'm thinking about all of the times that I've been timid. That I've held off doing something because it was scary or seemed difficult. And I'm wondering: Is it better to be bold and risk messing up for everyone to see, or to be timid and cautious and careful?

Anna's Birthday - Guess what! I'm 29...again!

How did I get so blessed? What a great day! Church was great (it always is!), and then the kids let me take a long afternoon nap. We had some friends over for dinner, yummy tacos with chicken, cilantro-lime rice (YUM!), black beans, corn, and cheese, and black bottom cupcakes.

Out of all of my gifts, the sweetest one was from Megan. She made me a card, and put $6 in it. She was so excited to give me "birthday money" because that was one of her favorite things from her birthday.I was so touched that she would want to share something that is so special to her with me. Now I just have to figure out what to do with it - I don't feel like I can give it back because she was so excited for me to have it, but I really don't want to keep her money because she's been saving for a special toy. Any suggestions?

Take Me Out to the Ball Game

We went to see the Astros' play. It was a lot of fun - Travis, Anna and Jared loved watching the game.

Megan wasn't too excited, but she survived.

Thanks to Chris Hunsaker from the Houston Astros for the tickets! We had a great time!

Jared's First Day of Preschool

Jared is attending preschool this year! In this area, most of the preschools are run by the local churches. Jared is going to one run by the Baptist church. It's been an interesting so far. Most of the preschool curriculum is the regular reading, writing, math, art, large and small motor kinds of things that you would expect, but there have been a couple of differences. For example, one day Jared asked me why when his teacher at school prayed at lunch time, her prayer was different than our prayers. It was a wonderful opportunity for us to talk about things and I'm hoping to have more opportunities during the year.

His first day was pretty gray and wet, so I'll have to take some better preschool pictures another day to get him with his new backpack and lunch box. I can't believe how big he is getting!

Grandpa Mark and Grandma Suzanne's Visit

We had a wonderful time with Grandpa Mark and Grandma Suzanne. It was great to have them here!

We went swimming, went to Katy Mills Mall to ride the carousel and the train, worked on projects around the house, and played lots of games. We love it when they visit!

Painting Ceramics

Megan really wanted to go to a local ceramic and plaster shop while Grandma and Grandpa were visiting. Since this was the first time we have done anything like this, it was quite a big adventure. I wasn't sure what to expect, taking two kids into a small building filled floor to ceiling with breakable items, and to turn them loose with paint palettes. It was so much fun! We can hardly wait to go there again.

Megan chose to paint a ceramic bunny. She was so excited to learn about ceramic paints, and to watch them mix the colors for her. It was hard to leave her bunny for firing, but it was exciting to come back and pick it up later when the colors were darker and glossy!

Jared chose to paint a plaster pumpkin decoration. He's had it displayed on his dresser since we brought it home, and he's anxiously waiting for the day we get to hang it up with the rest of the Halloween decorations.

Travis got in on the action as well. He painted a really cool pitcher a dark blue that matches our regular dishes (which I love). The pitcher makes a beautiful vase on the kitchen table!

Megan's 7th Birthday

When did my little girl get to be so big? It's crazy! How did we go from this

to this

in the blink of an eye?