My sweet Megan

Megan,

You are such a smart, sweet, helpful girl! You love playing Barbies and Princesses and school. You are kind to your brother, even when you wish he would leave you alone. You love playing with your friends. I don't know where you get such a social streak, but you thrive on parties and play dates and spending time with friends. You love clothes and fashion and accessories. You love art of all kind - painting and ceramics and all kinds of crafts. You are doing so well in school. You are a great speller (you get that from your dad!) and you are so good at math (you get that from your dad too!). You are reading so well. I met with your teacher last week and she said that you are doing wonderfully.

I love you and I'm glad you are mine!

Love Mom

I love my Jared boy!

Jared,

You are such a smart, funny, energetic boy! You talk non stop, even during dinner (that's why you are always finished last). You love spending time with your sister. You love to tease her, torment her, and tickle her. You love to build sandcastles and draw with sidewalk chalk. You love to pretend.You have a new imaginary friend every few weeks - the most recent one is named "Little Mr. Smuchy Face" and is very naughty. You love to build giant marble tracks. You know all of your letters and what sounds they make and are starting to sound out words. You love to write. You love to read books, and to have them read to you. Your favorite songs are "Twinkle Twinkle, Little Star" and "Follow the Prophet." You are a hard worker - you are excited to do your job list every day, and you love to think of extra jobs to do when your list is done. You are enjoying preschool, but I am glad that you are still home for some of the time because I love spending time with you.

I love you and I'm glad you are mine!

Love Mom

This picture has a funny story behind it. One night, I told you "Run and get your pajamas." You took me literally - you brought all of the pajamas in your drawer out to the living room! You laughed and laughed because you knew that you had done exactly what I said, not what I meant.

So Blessed!

 
A few days ago, I had a bad day. Things hadn't really gone that well, and I was feeling kind of down and frustrated and ornery. During family scripture study before bed, we read a verse in Alma:

Alma 26:35

Now have we not reason to rejoice? Yea, I say unto you, there never were men that had so great reason to rejoice as we, since the world began; yea, and my joy is carried away, even unto boasting in my God; for he has all ^apower, ^ball wisdom, and all understanding; he comprehendeth all things, and he is a ^cmerciful Being, even unto salvation, to those who will repent and believe on his name.

Megan looked at me and said, "Mom, we really do have a lot of blessings, don't we?" Some times that's all it takes to shift things back into perspective.

Alma 26:16

Therefore, let us ^aglory, yea, we will ^bglory in the Lord; yea, we will rejoice, for our joy is full; yea, we will praise our God forever. Behold, who can glory too much in the Lord? Yea, who can say too much of his great power, and of his ^cmercy, and of his long-suffering towards the children of men? Behold, I say unto you, I cannot say the smallest part which I feel.

I really am so blessed. I have a wonderful husband and children who fill my life with joy. I have sisters who support and love me, who I can lean on in times of stress. I have a dad and stepmom, and father and mother-in-law, and grandparents who are such good examples of service and love and wisdom. I have a church family who have become very dear to my heart in the time that we have lived here. I have friends who are like family, who I can share ice cream and cookies, laughs and tears with. And most of all, I have a loving Heavenly Father and I have my Savior.

I'm not perfect

Hi, my name is Anna and I am not perfect.

I can't keep a journal because it intimidates me. The empty books are so perfect, so clean, so unblemished. I love to look at them, touch them, line them up neatly on shelves. But write in them? Gasp! I might make a mistake. No, not might. I WOULD make a mistake. I can't spell. My handwriting is atrocious. I would scribble things out. I would spill things on it. I would forget to write and get out of order.

Every year, in January, I make a goal to keep a journal. And every year, by the second week in January, I have given up. Those first few entries are labored over, in an effort to make them perfect. The struggle is too much, and so I give up. The first couple of nights go great. And then, one night after a busy day, I say to myself "I'll write tomorrow, when I have more time." And then the next night I say, "I have too much to write about to recap yesterday and today, so I"ll write tomorrow when I have more time." And then, the next thing I know, my beautiful new journal is sitting on my night stand, sprinkled with dust, with only the first few pages filled.

In my mind, in the perfect journal, the penmanship is smooth and flowing and elegant. The words are well chosen, the content is real, but at the same time it is always cheerful and insightful and uplifting, not preachy, but full of wisdom. The pages are smooth and unblemished. In my mind.

I am discovering that the image in my mind and reality don't mesh. And I'm working on becoming okay with that. Being okay with less than perfection. Or maybe I'm just redefining what perfection means. And I'm broadening my idea of what a journal should be. I bought a journal for my birthday. And I'm writing in it. Not every day. Not to record every aspect of every moment. Not to preserve my every thought for posterity. Simply because I enjoy the process. The idea of starting a new journal mid year seems wrong. The idea of not using it to capture all of the day's events, all of the cute things my kids do, seems selfish. The idea of not writing with the future generations - my children and grandchildren - as my audience seems wrong. But I'm going to do it any way.

My new journal is actually a book by Keri Smith called "Wreck This Journal." It's full of journaling exercises and assignments. Scribbling, riping, spilling, creasing, doodling, it's all in there. And I am loving it. I'm not writing in it in any kind of order, just doing what ever assignment appeals to me, so it won't be in chronological order, but that's okay. It is more me than any other journal I've ever kept. And that is a liberating feeling.

I'll post pictures as I go along. Here's my journal so far. I think it'll get a WHOLE lot messier before I'm done. 

Be BOLD

Mr. Irwin, my music teacher in high school, used to say, "If you are going to make a mistake, make a big one. Don't make a gray spot on a gray wall. Make a red spot. Don't make the mistake of being timid."

I made a red spot today. I went bold. I screwed up. I made a mess. And now I'm kicking myself. But, I'm thinking about all of the times that I've been timid. That I've held off doing something because it was scary or seemed difficult. And I'm wondering: Is it better to be bold and risk messing up for everyone to see, or to be timid and cautious and careful?

Anna's Birthday - Guess what! I'm 29...again!

How did I get so blessed? What a great day! Church was great (it always is!), and then the kids let me take a long afternoon nap. We had some friends over for dinner, yummy tacos with chicken, cilantro-lime rice (YUM!), black beans, corn, and cheese, and black bottom cupcakes.

Out of all of my gifts, the sweetest one was from Megan. She made me a card, and put $6 in it. She was so excited to give me "birthday money" because that was one of her favorite things from her birthday.I was so touched that she would want to share something that is so special to her with me. Now I just have to figure out what to do with it - I don't feel like I can give it back because she was so excited for me to have it, but I really don't want to keep her money because she's been saving for a special toy. Any suggestions?

Take Me Out to the Ball Game

We went to see the Astros' play. It was a lot of fun - Travis, Anna and Jared loved watching the game.

Megan wasn't too excited, but she survived.

Thanks to Chris Hunsaker from the Houston Astros for the tickets! We had a great time!